nothing says fun like an accident and a bouat
well. sunday afternoons are really starting to perk up around this place. jesus howard christ. five six sundays ago a tsunami hit the island. yesterday, one hit me, alone.
or rather...i got into an accident. another damn accident. after having a rather rough day with things being shaky with rin and i, i was on my way to the top of the hill in town to have a drink, cry out our sorrows and talk with my friend about why relationships are so hard. while i was on my way, i was going about 50k/hr on a main road, and there was a car stopped in the middle of the road (a normal thing here, he probably wanted a break or felt like looking into a shop without getting out, so he stopped in the middle of the road...) while he was stopped, a motorbike with a man, a woman and a little itty baby pulled out infront of the car to turn right (remember, driving in thailand = not same side of the road as north america), didn't look at all, and in about five meters i had to go from 50k to 0, and i screeched, fishtailed, and smacked into their bike about two inches from the itty baby's leg. i was shocked out of my mind, and when the man was okay, he proceeded to laugh, and then say "oh, farang...bai. bai" (foreigner...let's go, let's go.) and without seeing if i was ok, my motorbike on its side, me alone in the street, they left. amazing thailand indeed.
i called rin and he came to look after things, and asked two thai men if i hit the other motorbike (as my bike was fine). they said no. however, it is hard to see an accident when you are working inside a shop. so after making a liar of me infront of my own boyfriend, i got on my bike, tears in my eyes, scrapes and bruises on my legs, heart deflated and sat on the hill for a good four hours.
amazing thailand.
when i got home rin apologized for being insensitive, and he believed me, he just needed to hear it from more than one person. this little conversation led into a big conversation that has been about a week in waiting. we have been getting further and further apart the past few days. i knew it was part of my intentional "pushing away" but he said he felt like he couldn't talk to me. sometimes he amazes me. he said to me, "just because we aren't together next to one another all the time doesn't mean our hearts can't be." this from a boy i thought was pretty reserved in his feelings. "you know i love you. your heart is with mine all the time."
this, then, led into the fact that i have to become alright with the fact that he and i can't be together all the time, as in july he has to bouat. bouat is a buddhist custom that usually takes place when the boy turns 20 years old. on his 20th birthday, the boy shaves his head (hair, eyebrows, facial hair), gives up everyday life, anything indulgent, and becomes a monk for at least three months. joy of joys. three months without any contact, any word from him.
i know this can be an amazing thing, and can really strengthen out relationship, but right now, when my family is so far away and making little effort to contact me, i just want to keep him as close as possible.
i suppose we will cross that bridge when we come to it. i will miss him. i know that for sure. i understand the necessity to bouat, but that doesn't mean i have to like it. *insert pout here*
or rather...i got into an accident. another damn accident. after having a rather rough day with things being shaky with rin and i, i was on my way to the top of the hill in town to have a drink, cry out our sorrows and talk with my friend about why relationships are so hard. while i was on my way, i was going about 50k/hr on a main road, and there was a car stopped in the middle of the road (a normal thing here, he probably wanted a break or felt like looking into a shop without getting out, so he stopped in the middle of the road...) while he was stopped, a motorbike with a man, a woman and a little itty baby pulled out infront of the car to turn right (remember, driving in thailand = not same side of the road as north america), didn't look at all, and in about five meters i had to go from 50k to 0, and i screeched, fishtailed, and smacked into their bike about two inches from the itty baby's leg. i was shocked out of my mind, and when the man was okay, he proceeded to laugh, and then say "oh, farang...bai. bai" (foreigner...let's go, let's go.) and without seeing if i was ok, my motorbike on its side, me alone in the street, they left. amazing thailand indeed.
i called rin and he came to look after things, and asked two thai men if i hit the other motorbike (as my bike was fine). they said no. however, it is hard to see an accident when you are working inside a shop. so after making a liar of me infront of my own boyfriend, i got on my bike, tears in my eyes, scrapes and bruises on my legs, heart deflated and sat on the hill for a good four hours.
amazing thailand.
when i got home rin apologized for being insensitive, and he believed me, he just needed to hear it from more than one person. this little conversation led into a big conversation that has been about a week in waiting. we have been getting further and further apart the past few days. i knew it was part of my intentional "pushing away" but he said he felt like he couldn't talk to me. sometimes he amazes me. he said to me, "just because we aren't together next to one another all the time doesn't mean our hearts can't be." this from a boy i thought was pretty reserved in his feelings. "you know i love you. your heart is with mine all the time."
this, then, led into the fact that i have to become alright with the fact that he and i can't be together all the time, as in july he has to bouat. bouat is a buddhist custom that usually takes place when the boy turns 20 years old. on his 20th birthday, the boy shaves his head (hair, eyebrows, facial hair), gives up everyday life, anything indulgent, and becomes a monk for at least three months. joy of joys. three months without any contact, any word from him.
i know this can be an amazing thing, and can really strengthen out relationship, but right now, when my family is so far away and making little effort to contact me, i just want to keep him as close as possible.
i suppose we will cross that bridge when we come to it. i will miss him. i know that for sure. i understand the necessity to bouat, but that doesn't mean i have to like it. *insert pout here*
posted by isobella at 11:22 AM
1 Comments:
Oh my gosh... How mean of that man to not even offer to help you. :/ Take care of yourself - Cris
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